Well I’ve been enjoying the sunshine and hope you have been too.  I stepped away from blogging but am back in the game.  I had been focusing on some necessary house and business projects which are now successfully completed.  I cleaned off the back padio and reconfigured the padio furniture to enjoy the flowers and sunshine.  Last evening, I put the chicken on to cook and poured myself that rare glass of wine - a lovely Riesling and read Dr. Wayne Dyer’s book on the Tao.  Truly inspiring.  And then I remembered I needed to respond to a blog comment. 

The question was “How does one know how to respond to every situation?”  In essence, we don’t always know.  Many times we wing it or fly by the seat of our pants, so to speak.  I have found that asking as many questions as possible and taking a genuine interest in others and learning about their interests, helps to steer me in the right direction.  When conversing with others, you could comment by saying, “that’s interesting - tell me more”.   

I have learned to love people and have chosen to be interested in people.  For the most part, people like to talk about themselves.  Some are shy, for sure, but many are flattered you would ask about them.  Another great question is, “why did  you choose to go into this particular industry or start this business?” I’m amazed that many people don’t ask the question, but many more don’t freely share the reasons for moving their life in a particular direction.  The answers will amaze you - and that sparks a whole new conversation.  For the most part, people is business, true entrepreneurs, are passionate about what they do.  It’s such a deeply rooted passion and simply being interested in others and allowing them to share it can be inspiring.

Business is all about relationships. Nothing more or less.  The products and services offered by a business are about filling a need or desire.  That’s the common ground.  Wealthy people have a different perspective, a different way of thinking.  So by asking others what they think about an issue or topic, will give you a hint as to their unique perspective. 

There is no doubt that when you engage in conversation with a business person, there is the risk they may try to ’sell’ you something.  Take the risk and deflect by simply saying something like, “so tell me a little more about what you do so I can have a better understanding of your business and industry.  Who knows, I might be able to send you a referral or hook you up with a possible strategic alliance.” 

So you may be asking yourself, what’s a referral and what’s a strategic alliance.  If you’ve ever given a recommendation for a product or restaurant - that’s a referral.  If you have ever suggested someone contact a particular person or company, because they could collaborate on a project together, that’s a strategic alliance. 

Continue to seek education - in all forms.  If you feel like a stupid five year old - good!  That means you are out of your comfort zone - and being uncomfortable is the only way you are going to learn and grow. Learn to appreciate and recognize that uncomfortable feeling.  Because the moment you start to retreat and head for safety and comfort, you stop growing and learning and that isn’t a good place to be. 

Entrepreneurs, business people  and wealthy people have all learned to take risks, continually.  They are creators and taking risks is the name of the game.  And only by taking risks do you develop the gift of discernment.  If you are baking a cake, you are a creator.  If you plant a seed and grow a garden, you are a creator.  If you organize games for kids, you are a creator.  If you get dressed in the morning, you are a creator. 

Think of creating as an experiment.  You experiment with a conversation and see what reaction you get.  You experiment with a new wardrobe and see what reaction you get.  You experiment with ingredients for a new recipe and see what reaction you get.  If the cake flops and tastes terrific, try a different recipe.  In business, we call this marketing - test and measure.  And if you don’t like the reaction or response you get, laugh it off, and try something else. 

Don’t take life too seriously.  By laughing at yourself and laughing with others, you become memorable and people will love your company.  If you don’t know something or don’t have the knowledge in a particular area, say so, and ask for help.  For the most part, people love to help others.

Come clean and say, “I don’t know anything about this industry- I’m green.  I want to learn so where would you suggest I start?”  You will be surprised at the response.  If you do get someone who blows you off, then you know they aren’t worthy getting to know anyways.  The others who step up and offer help, will be your best supporters.

Good etiquette is about making people feel comfortable.  Look for and stick close to those people who make you feel comfortable when you’ve spilled your guts. 

Even with my years of experience and knowledge, there are many many things I don’t know.  I just admit it and move forward from there.  Soon or later, you will realize everyone is just like you.  We all feel confident in the areas we are familiar with - the rest of the time, we’re pretty much acting as if.  That’s not a bad thing - just keep your chin up and be willing to face the music head on.  Now that makes good StyleSENSE!

admin Confidence

Creating a winning image is key to being exceptional and to lead the field.  The top five contestants on American Idol did a phenomenal job.  Each one is unique. And how each portrayed their version of the Rat Pack favorites displays their creativity and what makes them great.  Simon Cowell asked Allison Iraheta an important question - do you think you can win?  Taking and keeping the lead requires exceptional confidence.  For someone who dares to enter such a competition at the age of sixteen, she has great confidence.   However it’s all relative, as being able to answer that question with confidence and assurance is another matter.  You have to believe it with all your heart and soul.  Establishing expert status requires a knowing that is deep inside of you - no hesitation.  To be a winner you have to believe it and know it, no doubts.

Here is what I believe and know.  All five are stars and will have extraordinary singing careers.  Only one can win the title of American Idol for 2009.  So what’s holding you back?  Do you believe you are a winner - a leader in your field?  Maybe it’s time to boost your confidence and belief in yourself.

admin Confidence, Expert Status Allison Irahetz, American Idol, Simon Cowell

You know how some people just seem to have it.  You know - IT!  They’ve got that little bit extra - that extra confidence, they are self assured and know how to respond to every situation.  They’re cool and calm.  They are well groomed from the inside out.  They’ve got the EDGE.  Have you wondered what IT is and how to get it?

admin Confidence, EDGE, Image Makeover